redfirecracker | Jan. 12th, 2004

I came in to work today and discovered that my desk had been directly beneath this weekend's flood.

Fortunately, there was no permanent damage. Even my computer seems to have survived unscathed.

It sure was a shock, though, to come in and see what a mess everything was! There are fans and dehumidifiers everywhere, making quite the racket. Every available trashcan was apparently commandeered to catch leaks, and I just went through all the papers on my desk and threw out most of them, as they were too badly water-damaged to keep.

Happy Monday morning, I guess.

It's been a rough week or so, lately. There's always the post-holiday letdown, to say nothing of the first full week back at work after two half-weeks.

Plus, I received my annual evaluation and was bawled out royally by my boss' boss, who terrifies me under normal circumstances and competely traumatized me this time.

I'm pleased that I managed to stand up to her, instead turning into a pile of gibbering, weeping, fearful jell-o, and I am equally pleased that I did NOT spend all night staring at the ceiling and brooding over it. That's quite a big step for me.

*grins*

The good thing about getting a thorough reaming is that I now know exactly where I stand and what's expected of me. Whether or not I live up to those expectations is another matter entirely.

I hate this job and pretty much everything associated with it. It's not what I want to do, and I knew that when I took it. The only reason for taking it was to have my schooling paid for, which I will be starting in March.

And yeah, it's hard to make yourself work more than the absolute bare minimum when you're at a job you loathe and wish you didn't have to keep.

But it pays the bills and will pay for grad school, and then I can bolt right on outta here and get a real job, preferably closer to where I live.

I kind of lost sight of that goal for the last three years.

But getting sick and being forced to do very little else than to think upon my life really gave me the chance to put things into perspective, and I like to think that I'm back on track now.

Which reminds me . . . I have to call my contact in the grad department at Drexel and find out what steps I need to take to sign up for classes in March.

So, busy weekend all around.

My friend Amanda kidnapped me and took me shopping again. We went to King of Prussia and had quite a ball. I was really tired afterwards, though. I guess I'm still not up to snuff, walking-wise.

I got three new outfits and a bunch of much-needed brassieres and panties. I love that Lane Bryant employee discount! Fifty-five percent off is quite a whack.

Best of all, they're continuing the sale all week! Whoo-hoo!

Uh, not like I'm actually going to shop again, or anything. I might zip over to Cherry Hill one night this week, after work, just to see if they have a couple of pieces that I'm looking for, but it won't be intensive shopping or anything.

Not, you know . . . Olympic level-shopping.

Hm. What else has been going on in my life?

I put up an online personal ad recently, more out of curiosity than anything else. Years ago, when I thought I wanted to get married, I tried newspaper ads and had some good results.

So far, most of the responses have been looking for sex.

I should have known I'd regret picking this handle. But when I said "redheaded firecracker", I meant "red hair and a bad temper"!

Not many people seem to get that.

Aside from just general nervousness, I'm really undecided about whether I want to get involved even casually with anyone right now. I steadfastly maintain that I am far too busy for a boyfriend, to say nothing of the fact that I just don't want a commitment.

I'm really on the fence about this.

*dithers*

There is a guy who pinged me online. He really seems keen on meeting me.

I'm not sure how I feel about that.

This guy in particular seems . . . kind of pushy. I don't know the etiquette of online dating, so I have no idea if this is typical behavior or not. I don't really feel comfortable meeting a total stranger right off the bat. English is not his first language -- although he speaks much better than he writes -- so he doesn't like to email, and I won't give out my phone number ( because it's listed, and any idiot can find out where I live that way ).

So the only way to communicate with this guy is by me calling him. Which I don't always have time to do.

Mix in that he wants, like every guy, to talk about sex right away, and I'm . . . kind of talking myself out of ever meeting him.

It's all pretty weird.

I am soliciting opinions on the situation in general and him in particular, so please pipe up!

Feel free to tell me I'm a thundering loony. You wouldn't be the first.

*bopping off to read fic*