The Minutiae of Life as a Militant Squirrel

Sherman has been in the shop again all week. *sadface*

This means that I have been crashing on my mom's sofa, since I can walk to the bus stop from her house. *sigh*

I miss my car!

And I miss my house!

But! I made Mom watch my shows on Thursday night, and she actually liked Vampire Diaries! SPN just confused her, but that's understandable. It's kind of hard to follow if you're coming in cold.

Of course, it doesn't say much about Vampire Diaries that it is possible for a complete neophyte to understand it when plunked into an episode halfway through the season. But I never claimed that the show was particularly deep.

I've seen some people make the argument that Damon is a true psychopath, unable to determine the difference between right and wrong. I disagree with that assessment. Others argue the common definition of a sociopath-- that he knows the difference and just doesn't care. I don't think either of those definitions are entirely accurate.

I think Damon is equipped with a moral compass-- it just isn't the same one you or I or certainly Stefan might use. I've said before that he is almost entirely motivated by self-interest . . . but that extends to certain others he chooses. In last week's episode, he publically humiliates Alaric, but the action seems to be more about lashing out at Stefan. It certainly backfires on him when it upsets Elena. Later, when Alaric is so enraged that he finally decides to try and kill Damon, he has to attack him three times before Damon finally loses his patience and ends the struggle.

I think it's easy to see there that Damon doesn't actually want to kill Alaric. He doesn't see any point to it. Alaric hasn't personally caused Damon any grief--in fact, the opposite is certainly true, and Damon isn't above taking some petty vengeance in explaining himself--but again, it comes off more as impatient and frustrated than anything else. Hell, Damon isn't even hungry enough to want a snack. The attitude seems to be that Alaric has deeply inconvenienced Damon by insisting on dying in his living room, but, whatever. Damon has other things to worry about.

Damon seems to like playing mind games, but he mostly likes to play them with Stefan. In fact, as much as he is obsessed with his memory of Katherine, the great of love of Damon's life is actually his brother. His world actually revolves around Stefan-- whether tormenting him or using him in some fashion, or even the few occasions where he seems to exhibit honest warm feelings, however brief.

I think Damon is angry, yes, but also bored, and--though he won't admit--very lonely. He's had nothing but endless rage to keep him company for the last hundred-odd years, and although he's allowed some relationships to go a little deeper, they've still mostly been superficial. And I wonder how many of them went bad for him and reinforced the trust issues he already had?

Look at what happened when he went on a road trip to visit an old girlfriend; she betrayed him and tried to have him killed. So of course his moral compass dictated that he kill her--not just as reflexive retribution, but I think also as a pre-emptive strike against any further actions. That's something else I see in Damon-- he has a temper, we saw that when he attacked Bonnie in a rage after she destroyed the amulet while possessed by the spirit of her ancestor, Emily-- but he's often very cool and calculating in his actions. "An eye for an eye" isn't just a saying for him . . . it's a way of life, and it kind of has to be, because he probably has to assume that anyone who's tried to kill him once will try again.

No wonder he has trouble believing in people. I sympathize.

Okay, yes, in addition to being more than halfway in love with Damon, I identify with him quite a bit as well.

Hell, if I were an immortal vampire with the strength and speed to be able to do it, I'd probably rip out the heart of someone who broke mine, too.

You know, because bloody mayhem and gruesome violence just relieve stress so much more than posting in one's LJ ever could!

*grin*

The Vampire Diaries has totally sucked me in-- you'll pardon the pun, I'm sure.

The show starts at unlikely and blows straight through implausible, out the other side into ridiculous. Let's just begin with the idea that it's set in Virginia . . . and yet NO ONE SPEAKS WITH A SOUTHERN ACCENT.

Nope. Not a one.

I lived in freakin' DELAWARE for almost two years. Half the people I heard on a daily basis-- and I'm just talking about passing through in a supermarket or an Applebee's or a Wal-Mart-- had Confederate license plates and Southern accents. Virginia's even further south of the Mason-Dixon line, and you expect me to believe that EVERY SINGLE RESIDENT is totally Northern in speech?

And the general historical inaccuracies would make my head explode if I focused on them, so I'm just going to ignore them ( just like the writers do, it seems ).

Yeah. See that hook up there? No, the one on the thirty-fifth floor of the skyscraper next door. Yeah, that's your disbelief, suspended allllllllllllll the way up there.

Let's not even get into the question of thirty-something actors playing high-school students, shall we? Mmm. I thought not.

And speaking of high school . . . yeah, I REMEMBER that teenage angst, that sense that everything was the END OF THE WORLD, but JFC GTF OVER YOURSELF BITCH.

Which is doubtless what people my age have been saying to people of that age for hundreds of years, so hey! I have something in common with hundred-and-fifty-year-old vampires. Who knew?

Actually, the entire show is kinda like BtVS / Angel, Smallville, and Twilight all mashed up together, and I spend half my time watching it through my fingers and alternately chanting, "I'm too old for this show," and, "I can't believe I'm watching this crap!"

And then Ian Somerhalder's Damon sweeps on screen and blows me away, and I remember . . . yeah, THAT'S why I'm watching it.

My bulletproof kink has always been insane antiheroes.

I love a bad boy in any form, but give me a beautiful, brilliant nutcase with a purpose ( and usually displaying some kind of twisted emotion ), and I am GONE.

It's why I loved Sam in BUABS . . . Angel after he lost his soul . . . and now Damon, the malicious Machiavel with a diabolical plan.

I mean, come on-- what's not to love about a guy who has lines like these:

I promised you an eternity of misery, little brother. I'm just keeping my word.

And then you get Stefan going off and being all tortured and broody and squirrel-eating. I'm waiting for Damon to call him a little bitch and be done with it.

I wouldn't go so far as to call him "comic relief", but Damon always has the best lines, the sharpest delivery, that little zinger that puts one over on someone ( usually Stefan ) and makes me grin.

Like after he gets attacked and is on the phone telling Stefan about it-- and when will Civil-War-era vampires talking on cell phones ever stop being funny, I wonder-- and Damon is, of course, threatening to rip the culprit to pieces over the incident:

Stefan: Are you okay?

Damon: No, I'm not okay. I was ambushed, I was shot, and now I'm vengeful.

I like Damon being pretty much out for himself. He's kind of an asshole and he really doesn't care. There's a certain logic to his behavior . . . like when he confronts the mystery vampire about who turned him and this scene happens:

Logan: Whose side are you on?

Damon: I'm not on anybody's side. You pissed me off. I want you dead.

And he's very casual about it, very matter-of-fact--almost a quid-pro-quo kind of reaction. He obviously has feelings and emotions, but they're all very self-oriented.

Hot Topic put out "Team Stefan" and "Team Damon" t-shirts. I'm humiliated to admit that I actually-- however briefly!-- considered buying one.

Fortunately, it's a crappy picture, and since the thought of giving my money to Hot Topic makes my skin crawl on principle, I was saved from my own rabid fangirlishness.

Sigh.

I'm gonna go slash the brothers Salvatore for a while, now.

Yum.

. . . are walking through the hospital hallways ( all right, that already looks like the setting for a horror movie ), the fluorescent lights begin to jump and flicker, and you immediately begin to pat down your pockets, looking for salt.

Amusing addendum: when relating this story to my supervisor the next day, she knew EXACTLY WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT.

So that makes two of us who are watching WAY TOO MUCH TV.

Or, The State of the Squirrel.

Wow, I haven't done one of these in a while. I don't know whether that's because I don't feel like I have much to say, or I'm just not motivated to say it. Maybe that's why I like memes so much . . . it's kind of like sending an LJ postcard, you know? A small, electronic way of saying, "Hi! Still alive over here!"

~~~~~~~~~~~

Everyone and their brother is going nuts over the Eagles game yesterday. People around here are ready to canonize Donovan McNabb, when three weeks ago, they were burning him in effigy. Philadelphia is a fickle town, and a hard town on its teams, but I have to ask-- were you people even watching the same game I was?

Because what I saw was the same unreliable offensive performance that has been common to the Philadelphia Eagles for several seasons. Sure, Dawkins had a breakout play or two. Of course Westbrook had some stellar catches. But McNabb was, as usual, inconsistent at best, and overall, the offense did not appear to function as a cohesive whole. On the plus side, the Eagles' defense performed admirably, but the main reason the Eagles won? Was because the Giants clearly wanted the loss more.

What the hell happened? Did the whole New York team get up on the wrong side of the bed or something? They looked like CRAP out there.

The Steelers-Cowboys game, though, was so fucking awesome, I was screaming in the family room! I love that kind of game . . . tight score, hard-fought, and a real nail-biter of a finish. Plus, I love watching the Cowboys get their asses handed to them, and have ever since I watched Minnesota make Danny White cry on the field like a little girl, way back in the early eighties. I'd like to see Ben Roethlischberger be a little less willing to take a hit, though . . . he's of the Troy Aikman school of quarterbacking, and is going to finish his career like him, too, if he's not careful.

Unfortunately, my poor Falcons were NOT who dat team gonna beat dem Saints. I was disappointed but not surprised. They suck but I love them anyway. I have high hopes for Matt Ryan's performance at QB next year.

I started getting more into college football this year, but I admit I don't understand how the conferences and bowls work. I root for the Wisconsin Badgers, who I see from their website will be in the Champs bowl, whatever the fuck that means . . . but I have no idea how they got there. I asked my dad but forgot to preface my question with the phrase, "In twenty-five words or less..." and tuned out ten minutes into a rant about the political selection process and the degeneration of the country's moral fiber. *scratches head*

~~~~~~~~~~

You know Alastair on SPN is being played by the same actor who played Bogs Diamond in The Shawshank Redemption? I kind of feel like he's playing the character the same way, too. In fact, that's what tipped me off that it was the same guy . . . something about the way he cocked his head and eyed Dean like he was thinking about saying, "On your knees, bitch," and I was all AHAHAHAHA!!

Heh. We already got canon-bisexual-Sam . . . now we have canon-jailhouse-assaulted-Dean. The fanfic is just writing itself at this point, isn't it?

~~~~~~~~~~

So. Wound up with a new dog. I'm not entirely sure how this happened so soon, and I think maybe I wasn't quite ready, but at the same time, I hated going home to my dog-less house, and the opportunity suddenly presented itself, and poof! Free dog! She's a black-and-silver German Shepherd who I promptly named Stolichnaya-- Stoli, for short. 'Cause, you know . . . I name all my pets after booze, even though I don't really drink. Anyway, Stolichnaya vodka came out with Stoli Elite, which has a black, silver, and gold-trimmed label, which pretty much matches her coloring, so it fits.

I decided to look for a younger dog this time around, but I forgot how much energy a three-year-old would have!

Stoli's like an eel on springs. She thinks the most fun EVER is to run up the stairs and then leap all the way down in one bound. The fact that she skids into the front door and promptly bounces off to slide across the hardwood floor in the foyer seems only to be a bonus in her mind. It's a bit of a shock after Yueng, who was a slug after my own heart. But it's good for me to be out getting more exercise, and Dad plans to fence in the back yard in the spring, so Stoli can chase squirrels to her heart's content and work out some of her energy that way.

In the meantime, at least she likes to play fetch, which is relatively easy to do in the house from in front of the TV.

When it's time for another dog, I am definitely looking at senior dogs again . . . nice, calm, sedate animals who are happy with short walks, long naps, and good meals.

But have some pictures! She's a cutie. And she was very, very sorry when she whacked me in the face yesterday and nearly broke my nose.

Me and Stoli watching football on Sunday.

This is her WTF? expression. It's more common than you might think.

Tomorrow I have off to go to a funeral. Kristin's grandfather died-- no one can say it was unexpected, exactly, because the man was 97 and in poor health-- but it's always a surprise, no matter how prepared everyone might be. I have to get home and figure out what in my closet fits and is appropriate. *sighs*

More to say, but time to go. See you all on the flip side.